I'm sorry, Smith & Company, but regular Altoids just don't cut it! Those are for extremely old people, not mid-twenty-somethings! Ugh! I'd come out of my sour-induced delusion more depressed than ever that it is 2019 and I don't have any mature-yet-fun sour candies to destroy and share with friends. We are all still in agreement: We remain very sad about this!Īnd, sure, yeah, I could go ahead and pay that $1,500 for a few fleeting packs of glorious, sweet-n-sour nostalgia, but what then? I'll tell you what: I spiral into a deep dark hole of wishing it were 2008 again, without being able to extricate myself once I'm through my eight extremely old Sour Altoid containers that I bought off an eBay stranger. I just asked, like, four of my best high school friends. The long answer is they did not ask the vaguely cool teens in northeast Jersey circa '06-'09 if they'd break all of their fucking hearts by doing so. Why would the company-one that will absolutely never die, their Curiously Strong Mints will live forever, etc., etc.-disavow something that was so formative in so many kids' lives? Well, the short answer is money (they pointed to "low national demand" via Bustle back in 2015). What screamed "THIS IS AN ADULT RIGHT HERE" harder than someone who had readily accessible candy that not everyone could physically handle? The answer is nothing. They were the perfect transition from Warheads (a sour candy for babies, obv) and Sour Patch Kids (it was OK to eat those, but only really in a movie theater setting) to bonafide grown-up suckers. The indisputably cool, suuuper sour hard candies were reportedly discontinued in 2010, a mere six years after they first came into my angsty early-teen life. Play icon The triangle icon that indicates to play
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